Who is ZsaZsa Zaturnnah, you ask?
“Ang Kagilagilalas Na Pakikipagsapalaran ni ZsaZsa Zaturnnah” (The Spectacular Adventures of ZsaZsa Zaturnnah) is a modern-day comic book about a gay beautician in the countryside who suddenly receives a giant stone from outer space. He swallows it and becomes a voluptuous female heroine out to defend the Earth against giant frogs, zombies, and amazon women from Planet X…x…x…
This comic book is actually significant to me. Two years ago, after I helped a friend in researching for plays our theather org could perform, we went to a local bookstore and she introduced me to a ZsaZsa Zaturnnah comicbook. Since private reading is allowed in the bookstore, I took the preview copy and read it.
Boy, it was a total laugh trip. I couldn’t help myself laughing so hard in the bookstore. I tried controlling my laughter but drops of saliva would came out. It was so embarrassing, surrounded by bookworms digesting their T.S. Elliots and Brontes, a lone gay was laughing his heart out over loads of punchlines riddled in the comics.
After finishing the whole comicbook, some of my friends suddenly appeared out of nowhere, birthday cakes in tow.
“Happy Birthday, Maruja!”
Who would have thought that I would celebrate my birthday in a bookstore? I was so glad for them.
They gave me a special gift, and guess what it was?
A copy of ZsaZsa Zaturnnah.
WHEN GAYS GO, “SIGH…”
I and some gay orgmates of mine were walking near the university when we spotted a giant billboard of local heartthrob Dennis Trillo.
We all stared at his angelic face and sighed.
“Oh God! He just melted my heart,” I exclaimed.
“He’s so handsome,” a companion of ours agreed.
And you know when gays talk about guys, the main topic is…
“Is it true that he’s ‘small’?”
“Well, who cares if it’s small,” I said. “It would be a privelege for any gay to give him a head.”