I personally would like to welcome you to my queendom…my domain. My name is Empress Maruja, daughter of Emperor Jovenal, son of Dowager Olivia.
Okay, enough of that “creative introduction” crap. You can call me Maruja. I’m from the Philippines and I hope you could take a peek of my journeys on and offline. Enjoy!
It was a start of a new week at the office. I work as a television practitioner. I was supposed to accompany our editor in arranging the segments for our upcoming episode, but when I arrived I realized that the prodcution assistant had to capture some additional clips, and it took quite a while. So, I made use of my waiting time solving week-old crossword puzzles and telling my stomach not to eat too much.
It was also a start of a new diet plan. First of all, I refused to call myself obese. I would rather consider my body as “mango-shaped,” a bit plump. I did not bother about my weight back then. I used to buy clothes that were tight-fitting because wearing tight-fitting clothing was all the rage then. I did not even bother to fit them before buying them. But whenever I would went home, half of the clothes would fit, tightly. The rest are how should I call these…a size too small.
Don’t bother me about taking me to the gym. I tried that once. After a continuing prod from my dad, I tried going to them gym, and boy was I the most ill-figured than the rest of the bunch. Although I enjoy running the threadmill while staring at the cute, buff guys beside me, but I was turned off when I was sweating profusely and the gym instructor asked me if those were sweat…or tears. I don’t deserve to be ridiculed.
So I continued to eat whenever I feel like it. Whenever I pass 7-11, I would head straight to the instant noodles section and buy the latest imported brands from Thailand and Korea. Or I would buy the oddest-flavored soda Coca-Cola and Pepsi could think about, like Pepsi Fire and Sprite Ice. Or I would grab the biggest Clover Chips or Lala Fish Crackers. Or sometimes I buy them all and indulge them in my midnight post-dinner while watching late night programs.
But last week, I was viewing video clips from our office’s first anniversary. I was stunned to see myself in the monitor. It was not a pretty sight. I could see my flabs coming out from my supposedly larger-sized shirt (I wore an L then, and yes, I still insist I’m an M). I could not believe that I became that wide, minus the “10 pounds” one gains when on TV. I looked at my bag and took out a brown paper bag. In it was a gift given to me by a co-worker during the anniversary. A gift that I will pay eventually after a month.
It was a set of diet pills.
I was advised to take a capsule twice a day. My eating habit would not change, the co-worker insisted. That catchphrase caught my attention. Day after day I popped two capsules a day. I did not bother taking measurements of myself befor taking them. I was afraid of seeing a 36-above waistline. But everyday when I woke up, my clothes feel a bit looser. I stare at my body and see rivers upon rivers of stretch marks along my thunderous thighs. My stomach’s skin began to look like crepe paper. I was losing weight so suddenly, so fast, and it’s scary. But I liked it.
I took the last pill Sunday. I see myself and was thinking “I don’t wanna go back to being fat.” I have to do something without buying 24 pills for 1500 pesos. From then on, I limited my food intake, I only ate when hungry (or acidic), and I stopped buying food from the convenience store. It’s a tough battle, and hopefully I’ll succeed.